Crazy Heart

Wish I had more control over my feelings. I see so many people with tough heart. Nothing affects them. They dont care about anything. "I dont care" is their attitude. Wish I was also like that. I am very sensitive though this is very short lived. I get hurt easily also become happy very fast. One bad thing about me is I can never forgive anyone sometimes that includes me. I make a mistake I will never ever forget it. Wish I was better.

I want to be someone with a dont care attitude. If someone is hurt I feel the hurt more than them. Thats bad. I have so much worries of my own to worry about.
We are all made differently, that should be the reason.
I dont like people who have no concern for others. Yet I am always meeting and socialising with such people. Its no more like school days where we have the choice to choose friends.

For some people, Any fault in their life has justification but in another its a crime. They keep complaining about things in their life but does not want a solution for their problem. I think they enjoy complaining. I have to admit I do complain but I take decisions to solve my problems. We should stop complaining and start making good decisions. Get over the bad and move towards the sun.

I hate gossip. If you come to me with complains about someone else I dont consider you a human. I am not interested in other persons life,including yours. You want to share your problems with me thats ok. I can also pray for your well being, but please dont come to talk about someone else. I dont want your opinion on the other person. I dont want to know his secrets. His marriage. Nothing. Even when I dont want to hear these, people keep saying things and I have to listen many times. Thank fully I have a gift, I only hear what I want to hear and keep only that in my memory.

I met a man who said there are so many fans for you. hhahahahaha...I really wanted to laugh out loud when he said that. Wish I was in college. If someone would have told me then these lines, I would have been on clouds. But now life has taught me better. I walk on burning coal. Everyday I am scared about tomorrow and having fans is something laughable.

From one of my experience what I learned is that you should be extremely cautious when talking to an Indian male brought up in India. Most of them associate everything with sex. I have not had this experience in talking with 100s of American men. They dont hide, if they like you they tell you and if they dont they again tell you. There is no inbetween.

Over all dont you think our heart is a crazy heart! I dont know what I would do without this crazy heart. Many colors it has that is making my life memorable.